Monday, April 26, 2010

Mamavation Monday, 4/26/2010

OK, I had another decent week. I gained back 2 lbs last week from being sick but I lost that 2 lbs this week. I am happy but irritated because if that would've stayed off I would be at my first goal which was to get back to 183. I lost 40 lbs last year but gained back 20 after my father in law passed away. That was emotional eating at it's finest! Plus, when a loved one dies everyone brings you food! So I am at 185.8. So now I will work extra hard again to get to 183!

I want to share my calories to make sure I'm eating enough. My mom thought I wasn't eating enough. I usually eat around 1000 calories a day and burn around 400 a day. I want to be healthy, but to be honest, if I eat more I don't lose. And I am usually hungry all day so I'll eat a piece of celery, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, a cantaloupe wedge. That would be for lunch. I'll have a salad with lots of veggies a a wee little bit of grilled chicken and a spritz of dressing for dinner. I don't usually eat snacks.

Anyway, I'm glad things are changing and only 1 pound until I've lost 20!

Also, check out Chiquita. I eat way more veggies and have been trying to incorporate more fruit.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Mamavation Monday, 4/18/2010

Well, I had a HUGE loss this week! But it was because my kids passed the lovely stomach virus on to me and I couldn't eat for 3 days! I actally orginally lost 7lbs (I have not been this sick in awhile) but gained 2 back. I knew I would gain some back as some was probably water. Hopefully none was muscle. So I lost 5.3lbs this week. I am down to 185.3. I hope it stays off. I am only 2lbs away from my first goal which was to lose the 20lbs I gained after my father in laws death last summer. I am sooooo close so I am going to work as hard as I can. I didn't get to exercise last week until Friday because this flu went through each of my kids (except my 4yr old. At least he was spared) and then me and my hubby. So I only worked out Friday and Saturday. Having a week off really affected my stamina! I was more winded than I was getting.

So this week I want to be super strict with myself because I really want to reach my first goal. i am sooooooo close! Lots of fruits and veggies and as much exercise as I can do in a day. I don't know why food is so hard for me. I wish I didn't crave cupcakes and cookies and sweet stuff. Fruit doesn't fill the sweet void for me. And I love to bake but I don't bake anymore because it's not healthy for me and I hate that. I miss baking (and eating it!) I have been trying to find a healthy dessert cookbook but can't really find one. I saw one that said desserts under 300 calories but that's as much as I eat in a meal so that's not low calorie to me!

Anyway, I am very happy with my loss but wasn't happy with how it happened. Hopefully I can lose 2 pounds this week and meet my first goal! Today already I've exercised for an hour. 30 min on the elliptical this morning (buring 400 calories!) and 30 min of mixed impact aerobics. So I've burne probably around 600 calories today.

And because everyone was sick last week I didn't get to comment on any posts. This week I should be able to. Have a great week ladies!

I am editing this because I gained back 2 MORE pounds. I'm up to 187. UGH! I was hoping it would stay off but I should've known better.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Mamavation Monday, 4/11/2010

OK, to be honest I don't feel like doing a Mamavation post but I'm doing it. I am completely exhausted. My dh was doing his cousins wedding 2.5 hours away so we went out Friday. The wedding was yesterday and last night my 8yr old starting throwing up and threw up all night. So dh and I got 1hour of sleep. He got to nap today but I didn't get too with my other kids being healthy and running around. So we got up way early and left way early. And I started my period. Maybe that's TMI but in the midst of helping B last night I knew I started and was thinking, "Thanks a lot for the added bonus!" And I blame my wedding cookie binge yesterday on that. And that it was a very slow wedding. My dh had the ceremony over by 3 but they hadn't even started the dancing until 7. This led to cranky kids and cranky mom and dad who couldn't wait to go to the hotel and crash only to be up all night with a sick kid and me with my monthly visitor. I was not able to exercise Friday or Sat and haven't today yet and I'm honestly so tired I don't know if I will. So I was not surprised when the scale stayed the same at 191 pounds. If it doesn't move when I work my can off daily and eat healthier then I knew it wouldn't this week. I'm thankful I didn't gain.

Hopefully no one else gets it and the week can get back to normal. Also please head over to Subway. I did not win again last week but maybe this week. I'm trying to win a $10 gift card and I could desperately use it since I am so blasted tired I don't wanna cook!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Alone, Incapable, Inadequate!

So I'm not good at keeping up at my blog. The fact is I always feel like what I would write is just not that important or interesting. Like the 3 words above, I have been feeling it today. I've been thinking the past few days that I feel alone. you wouldn't think that considering that I have 5 AWESOME boys and 1 AWESOME husband. It started a couple of weeks ago when my sister got married. She at first asked me to be her maid of honor. I was excited and happy because we've always been close and I know she is very close and best friends with another girl. Well, suffice to say she only asked me so I wouldn't be hurt but it didn't work. I did NOTHING as a maid of honor. It was akward and weird. Her friend did everything even though my sister assured me that I would be doing a lot during the wedding. I didn't even stand by her. So then it hit me. I seriously have no friends. Not one. Not even my sister anymore.Yes, she's my sister and I love her dearly, but things are different now. In fact I haven't talked to her since a few days after her wedding when I was watching my nephew while she was on her honeymoon.

It's been almost 2weeks and I'm wondering when she'll call. I shoud suck it up and call her but I was just curious how long it would take her. I'm always the one to call her and I wanted to try out my experiment. Well, it only made me more aware of how alone I am. Now part of it is my fault. I am a MAJOR homebody and I'm very scheduled. I do school with the boys in the morning then I have a schedule for the afternoon. Taking 5 boys anywhere takes time and effort. But I have no real friends. No one to call if an emergency happens at night. No one to talk to when I'm having a terrible day. No one to share my joys, pains, triumphs and failures. It's sad. Still I'm trying to look up and trusting that God has a plan for my life with friends. And I've gone to mom's groups. I went to one for 2yrs and quit because I started homeschooling more and I never really had made friends there. Well, just this week I saw 2 ladies from there and they didn't even know who I was!! So I am reading my Bible and digging into the friend who is closer than my brother. In closing this song really hit the mark with me today and I wanted to share it with you. It's by John Reuben.

Sunshine

It’s one of those moments in life when you feel incapable
I tried to hide but the feelings inside are sort of inescapable
And everything that I’ve become suddenly feels replaceable
And now I’m left to my inadequacy you get the point
All my goals seem out of reach and unattainable
Your thoughts get lost in the shuffle and become unexplainable
No words to match the emotion that I’m roller-coasting on
Just feelings of devotion and hope and that someday soon they’ll be gone

(CHORUS)
I know lessons are learned through perserverence and
I know I grow and when I can adhere to this
It’s just hard sometimes to keep yourself a good perspective
But God controls the hands of time
And when the time is right I’ll be perfected

Even when what lies ahead seems so unbearable
God’s grace is still so remarkable
Yea I can face any day with a faith that exceeds time and space
Lord give me the strength to change the pace
Cuz I’ve been burning on energy that was meant to be directed differently
No wonder we find ourselves empty worn out and burned out
With how things have turned out
We’ve learned how to cope but this whole thing is broke down and not working
Typical earthling searching for a system a coping mechanism
Listen we’re not meant to carry the load or bear these burdens on our own
I’m tired of living in survival mode
Gonna give it up and let it go

(CHORUS)

Give me some sunshine to clear my mind
And in the meantime I know that I’m gonna be just fine



Monday, April 5, 2010

Mamavation Monday, 4/5/2010

This week was not as good as past weeks. My problem is I felt like I was working so hardand practically starving myself and not seeing results on the scale so I thought, "why am I doing this to myself when it's not making a difference?" Then I proceded to eat a few cheese fries. Then the next night I had a few nachos. Then the next night I had a piece of cookie cake. Then the next night I had apple crisp. Now I still exercised about an hour every day. I still kept up the intensity as well. And I tried bike riding yesterday. We live near a parking lot so the boys and I had a race. We started in one row and had to go up and down each row and all the way back to where we started. It was fun! And the only thing that is sore is my bum!

Now the funny thing is is that I lost 2 pounds this week! I am down to 191! I am NOT going to keep up my bad eating habits, but I have decided to try the eat something small every 2hrs thing. I have been buying lots of fresh fruits and veggies and am going to eat those. I usually eat around 200-250 calories for breakfast and lunch and about 400 for dinner. And I usually burn 300-400 calories a day with exercise, which is why I am stumped as to why I have not been losing! (I rarely was eating any snacks and was hungry all the time!) So I am back on track and going to eat a little more. (but healthier this time). And my mom came over yesterday for Easter (she is into exercising a lot) and she took me out back to our giant hill and had me running down an then lunging up, then running down and walking up backwards (I was out of breath after the first time. Our hill is HUGE!) but now I have some outdoor ideas that I can do with the boys.

And I didn't win the shoes last week. My 3 yr old newbalance sneakers will have to keep on doing for now. This week I am trying to win EA Sports Active. I get bored quickly when i do the same thing but this would be perfect for me! Something different and new each time I would use it! I desperately hope I win this time! Until next week ladies!